Ditching the crutches.

Crutch: A device used for assistance or support.

A few days ago, three weeks post-surgery, I got rid of the crutches. Three weeks of hobbling around the city was rough, although, I was impressed with how sympathetic people were. City life sometimes seems so desensitizing. There are so many of us crammed into such little space. So many stimulants that cause us to cultivate indifference.

But the crutches made people notice. They helped me hail cabs. They gave up their seats on the bus. They griped at others who didn't. They offered to carry my groceries. They offered to make coffee runs. Sometimes-indifferent friends became concerned-supportive ones.

So in a way, they did provide assistance, support. In another, they were almost debilitating. Part of me has hardened into the consummate role of jaded New Yorker - I can and will be independent and do it all myself. This is hard for a person on crutches. You can't do it all yourself.

Which is when I realized, that sometimes I don't want to do it all myself. Sometimes I start looking for that other person to provide stability, support.

And then the New Yorker tells me to move back to Texas if that's what I really want. Because people don't move to New York to settle down.